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Super-aggressive “play” in foster
We have a cat aggression problem that we can’t untangle. I’m really hoping folks here have wisdom to share.
The cast:
– (our cat) Buffy: 5 years old, 10 lbs, female.
– (our cat) Marvin: 15 year old, formerly feral, maybe 8 pounds now? Kind of frail. Male.
– (foster adoptee) Eddie: 4 years old? 15.5 lbs, male. Not only big (by weight) but also tall. He should be a basketball player, if they had that for cats.
Background:
Buffy is 10/10 energetic, too much for Marvin. In an attempt to get her a playmate, about four months ago we got Eddie as foster-to-adopt.
We introduced Eddie to the family slowly, via scent exchange, incremental exposure through cracked doors, etc., and everything seemed great in these phases. No hostility, much curiosity.
Eddie has a sweet temperament to humans, is careful when he plays with us. He seems to really be aware of not clawing or biting us ‘for real’, and will be so gentle! He will literally nibble on my nose and stop, so he doesn’t hurt me.
The Problem:
Eddie will, if given the freedom to do so, “play” by attacking Buffy as if she’s some kind of prey. It’s like he goes into predator mode. It’s not aggression — he’s not growling, he’s not hostile, he doesn’t seem mad, he’s just aroused and his instincts take over. Because Eddie is big (15.5 lbs) and Buffy is much smaller (10-ish lbs) the “get the hell away from me” signals she delivers (clawing, hissing, screaming, fighting back) are not being received. It seriously seems like Eddie would kill her if we didn’t intervene. Surely he would kill the older and frailer Marvin, so we’ve never let those two interact with Eddie off-leash.
We’re spending a lot of effort sequestering Eddie from the others, swapping them between rooms, doing supervised visitations w/ Eddie on a harness / leash, or separated from the others by a child gate. We’ve recently taken to putting Eddie in a giant soft carrier, and all the cats will hang out in the living room. It seems nice and companionable. Buffy will even jump on the carrier and kind of inspect Eddie, who will either do nothing or else periodically lunge at her, only to be stopped by the walls of the carrier.
Buffy, despite being attacked a couple of times, seems continually willing to try to be friends, but her patience is not infinite, and our human patience is at a breaking point – it’s a full-time job moving the various cats around the house, getting them behind doors, spending time with them so they’re not lonely, etc.
Some other random facts that I don’t know where they should go or if they matter to this situation:
Marvin was born feral and lived outside for a year, and can’t be picked up. We have to move him around the house by bribing him with food.
Buffy was found abandoned on the street. We hypothesize that her insane energy was too much for her owner and they abandoned her.
The foster rescue people say that Eddie had a family, but they abandoned him when their house was foreclosed on. He lived outside for a year or two during this stretch. He was described as being “bullied” by the other street cats, which is weird to imagine giving his giant size.
Eddie is also extremely food-motivated. He’s a giant pain in the ass trying to break into cupboards, steal food off the counter, lick plates, etc. Believe me, he gets enough food — he came to us at 15.5, needing to lose 10% of bw according to the vet, and at worst he’s held steady at that weight. Maybe he’s a little bigger now.
The ask:
It can’t go on this way, but we really don’t want to give Eddie up. How can we get Eddie to pick up the social cues and get along? How can we get him to not attack Buffy? Is there any hope of integrating them?
We’ve done everything we can think of, and any help would be so welcome!
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1 Reply
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Hi Shane
Thank you for reaching out. There’s a lot to unpack here, and it might be worth having an in-home consultation with a cat behaviorist in your area.
Here are a few of my observations and suggestions:
Marvin – Although he is 15 and a little frail, if he is food-driven, you can target-train him to touch a target stick so you don’t have to worry about picking him up or luring him with food alone. Alternatively, toss treats into the dedicated room so he can walk/run straight into it.
Buffy – She is a young female who is very energetic and wants to play and interact with her new friend Eddie, but only on her terms. Although it’s been four months, some cats require more time (months to years) to adjust when a new cat joins the family. I know it’s a lot of work shuffling the kitties around; however, Buffy does seem happy to have a younger brother to play with. This requires more patience on your part.
Eddie’s strong food motivation is a great advantage for enrichment and training. I recommend increasing individual playtime to 2-3 times daily, introducing puzzle feeders and foraging activities to keep him engaged, and starting clicker training to help manage his boundless energy. Keeping Eddie confined to a harness/lead or crate may only add to his frustration and be counterproductive. Instead, I suggest taking him for outdoor walks, teaching him brain games, including agility exercises, and encouraging more stimulating activities. Additionally, you can work on basic cues like “sit,” “stay,” “come,” and “go to your mat.” to teach him good manners.
You are on the right track, just need to use the right tools and have more patience. I don’t feel you should give up on Eddie, and I see a bright future ahead.
I hope that helps
Melina
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